Acknowledging That You Have An Addiction May Be The Best Thing That Ever Happens To You

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Ashamed of our addictions, we hide them, we “fool” people, first we fool ourselves, and we lead a double, sometimes triple life. As Americans the chances are that we are addicted to something. There are so many choices, ones that we think about, such as drugs, alcohol, sex, food, smoking and gambling. Then there are those that are more prevalent and acceptable: Nielsen Ratings estimates that the average American watches 34 hours of television a week, almost 5 hours a day. If not watching television this time is often spent on playing video games. That is five hours a day taken away from a life full of meaning and purpose. A Time away from a productive, satisfying life. Time away from building relationships and community.

One way of dealing with addiction is to stop and try to control it on our own. This certainly makes life better, but unfortunately we usually replace one compulsion or addiction for another.

The second way is to call for help, see an addiction therapist or attend a 12 step meeting. Taking this step opens a life with unlimited possibilities. The potential to begin a rich, productive, full life filled with other people and community begins immediately. After a short time, people become grateful that they have an addiction, because their life has changed. They are no longer alone, they realize that many people suffer from the same problems and, in community, they build compassion for themselves and understanding of others.

With professional help they discover who they were meant to be on this planet. They free themselves from the bonds of compulsion, and learn that they really can reach goals and achieve dreams. The amount of time and energy spent with each compulsion becomes the time and energy that is put in fulfilling dreams, nurturing families, building deeper relationships with our partners, our spouses and our friends.

As a therapist I know that those who admit their compulsions and the painful effects of them grow several times faster than the person who claims only anxiety and depression. Desperation to change one’s life due to the pain we cause ourselves and others, leads us quickly to changes that would take years under other circumstances. If we are not forced to change, we probably will walk a life that never changes. At the very least our lives are boring. Often they are self-destructive.

When we seek help for an addiction, we are saying “I Want Life.”

My next article will describe an addict’s life and the road to freedom.

Brainspotting, Trauma, Anxiety and Depression

Brainspotting – The Gentle Way To Heal From Painful Events And Addiction

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Brainspotting, Trauma, Anxiety and Depression

David Grand, Developer of Brainspotting

David Grand discovered that by simply following the gaze of the eye, one is able to access painful memories and feeling states. When you are able to focus on a visual spot that coincides with a particular problem or upset, the brain will automatically begin to process and release the unwanted energy. This process is as simple as it sounds, and yet it is very powerful. As the therapist, my role is only to follow you and your process wherever it will lead us. I do not know where we are going but I am there to protect you on your journey. Of course before we can start the journey I need to gain your trust and become attuned with your goals and desires.

This process is affective with dealing with anxiety, depression, abuse and trauma. It can also be effective when you are unable to make a decision.

Often it has been thought that a person heals from their past by re-experiencing it, sometimes known as exposure therapy. Resourced Brainspotting, believes that the body can process from a very low state of agitation. In other words the calmer the body, the easier it remembers and releases the effects of painful experiences. The client also quickly learns that they can use these methods at home, to calm themselves in difficult day to day situations.

What is my personal experience with Brainspotting?

I have experienced many different paradigms of therapy in my life. All of them have been effective in supporting my own healing process. Brainspotting has played a unique role in allowing me freedom in my life. In a very short time it allowed me to process through trauma that I had been holding my whole life. It helped me handle situations in my life that used to seem impossible.

What is my experience of Brainspotting with my clients?

My clients are able to access their own rate of healing and are able to focus very quickly on what they want to heal. They decide at what intensity they are able to deal with a particular issue. Since there is no right way to heal, the client nor the therapist feel pressure to do it right. If the two of us hang out together, change will happen.

One of the most exciting aspects of this work, is that you do not need to remember the past, your body tells you the story, and then the brain automatically begins to heal the past.

Having been trained and experiencing the benefits of Brainspotting, I am passionate about sharing this experience with others. When someone comes to therapy for the first session, they are confused, anxious and scared. Taking the first step towards healing is courageous.

Anxiety and Depression – Best Ways to Treat Both

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Most of the causes of anxiety and depression are stored in the body. We may not remember events that happened in our lives, but our bodies remember everything. Our bodies store experiences that happened in the womb. Our frame of mind as an adult can stem back to what experiences our mothers were having when they were pregnant.

Most of us had parents who did “the best that they could”. My work as a therapist is not to blame parents but help my client’s bodies let go of the effects of what happened during home life, school life and often religious life.

What makes us human is our brain’s ability to discern, reason and grow. It also hinders our ability to let go of things that have happened. Our brains protect us from anything that may harm us. Human experiences can be so painful that the brain wants to protect us from the sensations in our bodies. Unfortunately these experiences are stored. When an animal is at risk, it does what it needs to survive, but then it is able to shake off the experience, even if it is life-threatening. It then gets up and moves on as if nothing has happened. Humans do not have this ability. We do not automatically shake off our experiences.

Recently a form of therapy called Brainspotting, developed by David Grand allows the therapist to help the client shake off past body memories. What is even more important is that it teaches people to shake off their own negative experiences as they occur. Therapy is only as useful as what you can take with you out of the office and use on your own once you leave the room.

Most of us are conditioned to be afraid of our bodies. Sensations and emotions are foreign to us as they were to our parents before us. Seldom do we learn at home or in school how to manage and be with the experiences that we are having. Worst case scenario is we are told not to have the feelings or experiences that we are having. We shouldn’t feel this way. At best we are told that what we experience is normal; almost never are we told how to experience our experience.

Depression often comes from learning to suppress and oppress our feelings. Anxiety comes from being overwhelmed by our experiences. Brainspotting teaches us how to do both: let our feelings out and survive the experiences we have had and are having. Any techniques that teach us how to be with who we are, what we feel and how we experience things helps us alleviate depression and anxiety.

When a client comes to see me, I ask them what experiences are happening in their body that most distresses them. We then measure the intensity of the experience. Then I find where a client feels the most calm. From the place of calmness a person can release the intense experiences of distress. I then teach them to do this on their own.